WTF FML SMD

Four years of learning about original ideas, aesthetics, things that are awesome and things that are not.
This falls in to the category of not.
this poster is ment to entice people to come and look at my art, what my four years of study has amounted to.
It has a gradient.
And a lame comical novel font.
It could have been made in word.
I feel violated

My Exhibition Space

These walls have been filled, sanded and painted THRICE so should be pretty damn smooth

small works

derived from boredom and wanting to use the amazing photography in my 1950's knitting book

Drawings of hair

the end is neigh

I had a meeting with Mike and Gina about ten minutes ago and they said.. much to my delight and disgust,
"don't use the lenses, it becomes a new work when you add them and your work should stay subtle and delicate" or something to that effect.
*blank stare*
YESS!!!!! no more spending money on things that won't even work YAY but in the same breath BOOO i could have spent the past two weeks making more lace or being at work earning money. Pressure is off now phew so all i have to do is...
-set up the works exactly how i want them, photograph it X
-plaster and sand the walls immaculately X
-paint walls X
-bribe tim to help paint walls XX
-sort out my research and present it clearly
-print business cards
-clean the light box and possibly get a new cord put on it X
-think of titles, i have a few ideas but the words have to be perfect or i will go without

apparently we have to leave business cards. sigh. because i will not be there i will be getting on the piss in a woolshed in the depths of western southland. here are a few ideas. tell me what you think. guess which one is the one i made trying to be funny, go on.

magnifying lenses are stupid

i hate sketch up too. when i think green axis it should intuitively know and just make the shape on that axis WALL NOT FLOOR PLEASE

Why? because they're impossible to fix to a wall. ROAAARRRRR.
I went to modern plastics last week and looked at getting acrylic rods to somehow drill into the walls and fix the lenses to. It cost $42.90 per 2metres for the 10mm stuff, and can only be bought in 2m lots so i would be looking at getting roughly 4 metres. This isn't too extortionate but the man there reckoned that it would not be able to be glued to my lenses and that i would have to find some sort of glass clips. I didn't entirely believe him so went back to school and talked to Greg and he said the same thing, its too hard to try and glue things to a convex surface. feck. Greg suggested the above as a solution but i think it will look to heavy compared to the work, wooden structures overshadowing my little objects. fuck me i am stressing out right now. need icecream and wine.
I went to Atlas glass and had a good chat to the hairy man there who will win at movember at he said 'go and die, you cannot get anything to clip on to curved glass nor can you drill through it', and with that i hopped back in to Jim's Holden barina and promptly got lost somewhere in Waitakere City.
Eventually i found Cambrian plastics, the lovely people there cut me a sheet of acrylic for about $10 cheaper than the price they quoted me which was $10 cheaper again than anywhere else i rang. Score! except when i got home i found that he cut it slightly crooked so it does not fit my light box. wanker. Not to worry i will have to go back and get acrylic for Francoli's light box too so i can say hey motherfucker do your job and cut this right. Everything is a little bit intense right now you see.
I got another sheet of acrylic so that i can drill through it and hammer little nails in to it to hang my work from. yeaaah. If i decide to do this i need to find some longer square hooks and ones that aren't that heinous gold colour. maybe i could paint the hooks a see through colour. excellent.

box'o'lightern

how the fick am i meant to float these exactly here?? i wish they could just hang from strings. I quite like that you can pick up the lenses and play around with the magnification, i just don't know that people would participate in this way.

curlies from being stuck on a bobbin all day. I left these on the end of the lace as a trace of the method used to create it, not many people would guess this though.
Chantilly style lace that isn't really Chantilly because i couldn't find a pattern, google it and you get the song by the Big Bopper. I made up a pattern based on what i know from lace making and it turned out ok, i made a few mistakes along the way but i like this one better than the braid lace
I have no idea how to set my camera to photograph a light box, cannot sus the light balance at all!!
amanda lace. I can't wait to spend a decent amount of time learning these techniques properly, possibly getting lessons then making something magnificent out of hair. maybe a project for next year :) This one is a strand of my DNA.
every single lace making pin i have is right here in this forest of hairyness. smear on my lens btw.
I got some square hooks and think these are a great way of holding the lenses to the wall, maybe silver ones would look better, these are the longest i could find so i have to get on the hunt and find bigger ones to allow more magnification

Presentation ideas/will nothing work/i'm getting a cold/ more interested in making penis pictures on photoshop

hello. amanda bought UHU branded 'gel' glue, @ $6.50 which was $4.70 more expensive than previous glues that have been troublesome and too sticky and stick fingers hair table glue bottle needles to each other. This went all bubbly and i don't like it!!! ruined! expletives! not too worry i'll still wear it slash boo. see below what i have included amongst my objects if your eyes can strain that far into the pixel world. i included plain old hairballs because i have always liked the form they take, the way they remember that they are mine and therefore curly, defiant and impossibly knotted. I really want to use all of the hair i have, it's important but I don't know why yet :)
I like how they look in a very un-x-tina random way on the wall, they become more of an installation than something that's not. Fuck it I'm tired and not in the most loquacious of moods. The threads of hair are more part of the work this way because everything is on the wall. Paintings are put on walls. Art is put on walls. Craft is not put on walls. up is art. horizontal is other shit. up-phallic-you-know-the-story. don't argue with me.Ok so it is necessary to view my objects through magnifying glasses otherwise you can see none of the detail. How to fix these to a wall is the problem. I decided having things on a desk would be too.. well the desk would be intrusive and detract from the subtlety of the work. One idea was fitting them to perspex rods and sticking these into the wall. Acrylic rods are expensive, $42.95 for a 10mm length of 2m, and they only come in 2m lengths so there's too much money on something i think is not worth it. They would be quite chunky too and interfere with the tiny delicate objects of wonder.
IMHO <--- new wordy
This is imperfect and needs to be sanded again so i can get resin headaches and sanded-off ends of fingers that can't fing any more as a consequence. wet dry wet dry pretty smoothy paper of sand.

can you see now why my eyes are sore?

Presentation ideas

I just bought the jewellery box on trademe, unsure if i will use it but i want to try out a few of the ideas that have been buzzing around in my head. The table above is a PRIME! it transforms into a sewing machine desk thing which is highly appropriate, dont know how much it will sell for but it would be nice to have my work on. I want my display to be wooden, yellowy, comfy looking yet antiquey... get me? Imagine my desk when i'm 80 years old and that is what my exhibition will look like, a personal work space that has a museum feel because its all fragile and old but still looks inviting to touch and personal. yeah. I'm going to study english next year.


Cool little magnifying glass^^ i am enjoying the little edward clippy hands on either side of it which will be prime for holding on to little hairy things. yaaaaayges ago i considered making lots of little objects and displaying them in a 'shadow box' like the one above. Granny Cush has one with all sorts of things in it like porcelain figurines, plastic and tin toys, mercury in a little bottle (my favourite), china shoes, lots of little oddities. I think her little shelves were formerly used to house printing blocks?? anyway they're way cooler than that one^

I have been trawling the internet trying to find magnifying glasses and lenses to present my works underneath. I'm yet to even really think about the lighting which will be a bitch.
I've found a lot of things that i think would suit my works for presenting them in or on top of, little wooden jewellery boxes, old library card catalogues, desks, etc. I really want a sort of museum aesthetic, but not so removed from the audience. The above video is a nice way of viewing the crafted object, travelling through the hair tunnel to get to it. I want the audience to get that feeling of abjection and the messy hair tunnel does this, leading to the fascinating obsessive object that is the crafted hair. The microscopic view moving around and through the object is very visceral, the circular framing of the tunnel is like Mona Hatoum's 'corps etranger', somehow more bodily... like wee hole. holey hole hole.

lace

On the left we have the lace as it looks when i removed it from the pricking. I was feeling a little disheatened then Sae hae pulled the threads apart and wa-la there was the pattern!! See what a difference things like thread size and tension make. i hate lace

My thread is too thin, this problem would be easy to fix, just buy thicker thread. The problem is that the hair i will be using is less than a tenth of the thickness of the current thread. hmm.... maybe the style of lace is not the way to go, i think something more abstract will have to do. The spangles are proving to be annoying with the thinner thread, I might have to cut them all off!

my lace set up

As you can see its not that easy to learn how to make lace from the $2.50 book you scored on trademe. I was about ready to throw this against the wall but patience and perseverance paid off.
Pins, learning my first stitch. Is it even called a stitch?!?! Experimenting with where the pins are positioned in the pricking, what a heart rate getting it right!
Pillow made with styrofoam, cardboard, staples, polar fleece circles and blue material which is fantastic for making lace with white thread but a nightmare for hair. woohoo!

Lace pillow

so i should have made this a month ago... tried making one with wadded up blankets and carboard and a staple gun... staples fell out, board bent, fabric wasn't hard enough. I got told off for doing things that were unrelated to what was going in my final exhibition and now when i try to do something fast and cheap it lies there like the half dead rat in the living room, not working, hating life. That poor little rat i wish i hadn't let it be poisoned I felt so bad seeing it too exhausted to move being tormented by Mitsy.
Back to the lace pillow, I made one from styrofoam that will last me at least until i make my first piece of lace, I also bought an old pillow so that when i make a proper lace pillow I can stuff it with panmure op shop stuffings. yum. I put down my name to volunteer there during the week. I don't know why I did this as I have far too much on my plate already. hmmm.

more documentato

vermicelli


hair woven in to an existing tatted piece of lace. Looks like a dirty smear, a web... boring.
Finished button! click to see the detail.

documentation

Learned how to wind thread on to the bobbins from the handy book i bought on trademe :) I wound hair on to these two, not as hard as i thought YAY!


The spangles I made today. Mint! I hope the fishing wire holds them together or i can always buy some thin wire which is what most people use.